I decided to cut ties with the agency and thus, the IPs. It sucks. It really, really, really sucks b/c they have to start over and they'll probably never really understand why I had to walk away but I just couldn't take that big of a risk. Basically, I was asked to forego lost wages in the event I was put on bedrest by my OB. It was too much of a financial risk for them because it could be a lot of money, which was exactly MY point. What if I was on bedrest for several months? The agency proposed that I pay it out of my comp. Let me assure you, I've talked to lawyers, surrogates, IPs, other agencies....no one...I mean not one person felt like this was a good idea and they all said the same thing. "Run. Run fast. Run away while you still can." So, I followed my gut and now I am starting from square one. A much more experienced square one, but a disheartened square one. I'm trying to look forward and not let this affect my enthusiasm for surrogacy, and it won't be a permanent damper, I know...but it did bum me out.
So, my many new surro buddies over on the SMO boards have given me more than I can handle when it comes to new avenues to pursue and I am completely grateful to have so many "strangers" care enough to spend time helping me look and pointing me in the right direction. It's been a strangely warm comfort to know I have their support. I still very much want to help the right couple create their family. So, I press on, but for now, I need to sleep so I can get up and exercise away the 4 lbs. I need to lose to meet the BMI requirements for some agencies. (In truth, this is a little bit of a joke because said agencies have told me 4 lbs. doesn't make it or break it, but alas, the truth remains that it is 4 lbs. I still need to lose. For me.)
Weekend at the beach house with friends. Can't wait!