A little about my life during my first journey as a surrogate.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Not Fair
Posting twice in one day may be a blogger's faux pas, but I'm prepared to deal with any consequences as the other was more of a "shout-out" than a real post.
A lot has changed in our little journey! The former ED had to be pulled off of the donor list for some personal reasons and IM called me, a little shaky in voice, and my heart immediately fell for her and my IF. "Not Fair! Not Fair! Not Fair!!!!!!" is what I wanted to scream out, but if infertility can teach you anything, it's how to get used to life not being fair. I won't claim to know what it feels like, but after hearing many stories of why couples are left with the choice of surrogacy, it does scream out that it is a difficult path and one that is still relatively new as far as modern science goes. Agree with it or not (and if you disagree, I honestly couldn't care less. Just saying), there is no denying the complexity of ART. Add in an ED, a SM and that little thing called "Life" and you need quite the lining of the stars for everything to go "right" the first time!
IM had some big decisions to make and was, thankfully, able to find an ED that she is thrilled about. (Stars aligning!) We now have a tentative transfer date of October thirdfourthfifthish....remember that uncertainty I told you about? :) Yeah, that gives us a three day window or so. I should be heading to Dallas the first week in October to transfer! It feels great to have a new target date and this allows me to get past my birthday, Rachel's first day (and few weeks) of school, and my grandparents' 55th wedding anniversary. (Awww, Al, I can't wait until that's us!) I would've been ecstatic had we been able to keep the original date, but there's not much to do about that except embrace change and it's going to be great. This time next year, we won't even remember the delays!
On a NSR (not surrogacy related) note, my baby starts school in 12 days!!!! I am going to be a bawling mess!!!! I'm going to try and refrain from crying (she's so independent and cannot wait to go to school!) as I don't want to upset her, but how can it be that my tiny little girl is walking into that big school all by herself!?!? I loved school as a kid. I loved the smells, the new clothes and supplies and the excitement of making new friends every year. I hope my darling girl has the same experience I had.
There is a Chinese proverb that says adversity doesn't throw you into deep waters to drown you, but to cleanse you. I don't know about that - but I know for sure that viewing things from this perspective can help to make the most out of a difficult and unfair situation.
Heidi-Thanks! It's bittersweet, I'm so glad she gets to go, but it's such a big girl moment! :) I joined the PTO board and signed up for some committees. My FIL works for the school district too, so he said he'll be popping in on her! haha
Mrs. Knight-I know! They've had a lot of disappointment, but it's nice that some things are starting to work out for them! :)
EDA-that's a great thought. Thank you for sharing!! :)
I'm a mom of three who is going through the process to be a Gestational Surrogate for the second time. I love to laugh, sing, read, spend time with my family and friends and talk to anyone who'll listen. Join me as I go through surrogacy's ups and downs, ins and outs and learn all about what it feels like to help create a family for someone else.
Sept. 15-start Estrace-2mg
Sept 10th-u/s-lining check-5.5 cms!
Sept 7th-AF (last one for 9 mths!!!!)
Sept 4th-last BCP
Sept 3rd-start Lupron 10u
Aug 15th-Start BCP
July 28th-start Estrace
July 19th-stop Estrace
July 15th-Start Lupron
July 8th-2nd u/s-lining check-11cms
June 29th-received final contracts and both lawyers approved!
June 25th-Start Estrace! Final drafts of contracts-almost there!!
June 24th-ultrasound-lining check-7cms
June 23th-AF arrived!
June 7th-received contract & sent revisions to IM
June 3rd-Flew to Dallas to meet RE & have hysteroscopy
May 31st-spoke to new IM
2WW: 2-Week Wait
AF: Aunt Flo -Your menstrual period
ART: Assisted Reproductive Technology
BCP: Birth Control Pills
BETA: Blood test for Pregnancy
BFP: Big Fat Positive (a positive pregnancy test)
BFN: Big Fat Negative (a negative pregnancy test)
CVS: Chorionic Villus Sampling
DE: Donor Egg
DH: Dear Husband
DP5DT: Days Post 5-Day Transfer
ED: Egg donor/donation
EDD: Estimated Due Date
ELV: Easy Labor Vibes
FET: Frozen Embryo Transfer
GS: Gestational Surrogate
GTT: Glucose Tolerance Test
hCG, HCG: Human Chorionic Gonadotropin
HPT: Home Pregnancy Test
IF: Intended Father
IM: Intended Mother
IP: Intended Parent/Parents
IVF: In Vitro Fertilization
LMP: Last Menstrual Period (start date)
M/C: Miscarriage
OB/GYN: Obstetrician/Gynecologist
PIO: Progesterone in Oil
RE: Reproductive Endocrinologist
ER: Retrieval (Egg)
8 comments:
so thrilled for you! Sounds like everything is working out just as it should. oh, and on the kindergarten front...deep breaths mama! It's a tough one!
My heart goes out to those IPs everywhere who have tried and tried, and then their dates fall through... etc. I can't imagine.
Is kindergarten a half-day? My oldest is going into 2nd grade and I STILL worry about her at school. Is she behaving? Is it fun for her? etc.
There is a Chinese proverb that says adversity doesn't throw you into deep waters to drown you, but to cleanse you.
I don't know about that - but I know for sure that viewing things from this perspective can help to make the most out of a difficult and unfair situation.
Heidi-Thanks! It's bittersweet, I'm so glad she gets to go, but it's such a big girl moment! :) I joined the PTO board and signed up for some committees. My FIL works for the school district too, so he said he'll be popping in on her! haha
Mrs. Knight-I know! They've had a lot of disappointment, but it's nice that some things are starting to work out for them! :)
EDA-that's a great thought. Thank you for sharing!! :)
Everything is falling into place where it needs to be for you all to have the PERFECT journey!!!
.....now I have more time to get you that box that has been sitting on my couch for a VERY long time. :-)
Hey there I stumbled upon your blog and just wanted to wish you good luck with your cycle! Hope you don't mind me following along.
Just started reading your blog and it's great! Looking forward to following your journey....Joy
Thanks for reading!! :) I appreciate it! :D
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